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Saturday, July 30, 2011

Late-Night Haiku XV (replacement)


I shall be away;

Weep not, dearest relations;

Haiku abides still.
Late-Night Haiku XIV


Truth and error mix;

If the Church errs unceasing,

What does Christ protect?


Friday, July 29, 2011

Late-Night Haiku XIII

I’d miss you, baby;
Let me be wrong, lovely girl.
Say you adore me.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

I hereby apologize if any of the previous lacks in the winsome manner for which I am reputed. [You've never been mistaken for winsome.--ed.] Just work with me here, OK? I do approach these questions with an intensity for which I surely am reputed. Anyway, I would like to say that I think Mr. Timothy Butler will a great PCA pastor, who will serve his people with love, honor, and distinction. Be nice to the FV hippies among you, Timothy. True, they may be nothing more than papist spies, but I promise, the first few waves at least, I had nothing to do with. If you serve there near your home, you must get to know Father Kevin Schroeder [shrayder] as long as he's there. Hilarious. He's our kind of papist, Comrade. [All papists are your kind of papist.--ed.] Not true; just the good ones. [Good with respect to what?--ed.] My editor is Captain Jack? What? That would be awesome. [If I was Captain Jack, you might actually listen to me.--ed.] Not likely! Speaking of things I learned from Captain Jack, obviously this guy hasn't heard of the "Church-state nexus." Quite frankly though, I'm just not comfortable telling God he's a barbarian. Like if He is real, he'll just sulk away, shamed by my superior moral rectitude! But behind that whole line of reasoning is the opinion that God isn't real. Like the whole religion thing is man-made, and its benefits are marginal at best. I certainly can see that opinion, though obviously, I don't share it. I hope this is tongue-in-cheek, but in any case, it's funny. Not that imperialism is funny, but gee, it's still fun to tell progressives to chill out sometimes. I like Thomas the Tank Engine (and that's what it's about, for those too lazy to click the link). I admit, I was a teenager when I saw "Shining-Time Station" which contained the Thomas stories. British people telling stories is often humorous, and almost always charming. I say that because I'm an idiot American, and we think accents are funny. Is anyone else stunned that VeggieTales hasn't been sued for all they're worth for cultural insensitivity? The humor of the show is based upon foreign accents and mild stereotypes. Not that I'm complaining, because it's funny, but I figured the nattering nabobs of no-truthism (Gracias, Nixon) would have their undergarments all in a bunch over that.
What is this post about? "Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up...": Timothy Butler, I love you, my brother, though you of course are wrong about everything [grin] and I take back anything and everything that may have been ungracious in our ongoing dialogue. If there is something specific, just let me know, and we can talk it over. Ditto, Anne Robinson, and I add that I love scads of Reformed people to the uttermost (so far as I am able, anyway) and you are no exception. My dear Jamie, ditto for you as well. You are like another conscience to me, and I only wish I'd known you sooner, though we will do our best to make up the time, won't we? This blog as been about the dogged pursuit of truth from its inception, and thus, of Christ. And yet with humor and a certain boldness. If it errs in that path in various ways, it is the sin of your humble servant. Lord, have mercy, and forgive me, dear friends and brethren.
5 More Inconvenient, Perhaps Offensive Thoughts Or Questions

5. Which community of Christians ought I to join if Catholic claims to be the Church Christ founded proved false? Does it matter if none that I'd join bother to claim it?

4. If councils may err, why hold a council at all?

3. If people may err in interpretation absent a charism of the Holy Spirit, why would simply increasing the number of people help? Why should anyone trust an ecclesial community that wasn't infalliable?

2. If the answer to (3)b is, "You shouldn't," are you saying I should trust myself?

1. If we are imperfect, the hermeneutical process is imperfect, and the Church (however conceived) is not infalliable, how do we arrive at the truth of revelation? Are you at all bothered by the fact that godly people using the same means and process cannot agree on the precise content of that revelation?
Late-Night Haiku XII

I’m a high-brow dude,
But let it not be doubted:
Stupid is funny.
5 Uncouth Thoughts on Authority and History

5. I'm still waiting for Calvin to tell me who the "true bishops" are.

4. If the New Testament is so plain, how come no one can agree on what it says?

3. Some people (attempted to) trained me to exegete the Bible in the original languages. Oddly enough, my confidence in its perpiscuity was destroyed. (Good thing faith in Jesus Christ doesn't rest on the perpiscuity of Scripture!)

2. Nevermind; I'm not waiting for Calvin to tell me anything, because his opinion on this matter means precisely squadoosh.

1. Being neither a saint nor a Protestant, I'd like to say that, well, nearly everything I believe is on the basis of the Magisterium's teaching.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Late-Night Haiku XI

Celebrate with me
The songwriting prowess shown
By a man named Walt.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

My wheelchair was nearly destroyed by a car last night. That's a bit melodramatic, I suppose, because it is intact and undamaged. But we'd left my power chair ("Red Sam" in the official designation) in-between the maze of cars parked out front of Chris Yee's house for Bible Study. [Isn't that a Protestant Bible study?--ed.] They are good friends, and it is not under any official auspices. [Not BSF?--ed.] They're BSF guys, but it's not a BSF study. Anyway, I wasn't worried; I made a joke about calling the vendor the next day: "What seems to be the problem, sir?" 'Well, it was destroyed by a car.' As it happened, a guy bumped into it at slow speed. His car got the worst of it. And this only reinforces what I've said for a solid 13 years [Quickie commercial coming] If you want a power wheelchair that lasts, get a Quickie. They're fast, obviously, and they're tanks. Heck, my old one still would work, but the batteries are shot. Probably the greatest invention in the history of power wheelchairs is the metal foot-rest. When the things were mostly plastic (and we're talking the swing-away rests here) you could snap them by driving fast with them swung out, even if you didn't run into anything. Stupid.
I didn't come here to tell you that, as the great Cosby says. I'm beginning to realize what my role in the world is: I'm a provocateur, and I bring clarity when people are content with unclarity. It happened last night. And it made me sound angry. I wasn't. I just took note of the fact that all the possible answers for how to understand this text we were addressing were on the table except the right one. The Kingdom of God and the Church have to be the same thing. This was the text. I take it for granted that Jesus views the Kingdom of God in positive, glowing terms. I still haven't figured out why the Reformed separate the two. Why did we even begin to talk about how "leaven" often refers to sin in the New Testament? It obviously doesn't here, even if we grant that the birds of the air are evil, like they appear to be in the Parable of the Sower. Is not the Kingdom of God the place where God reigns? Has He not promised to be our God, and we will be his people? Last I heard, we were a spiritual house where God dwells by His Spirit. Oh, wait, he's talking about the Church. Exactly! But if somehow they were separate, isn't this a way of saying, "To hell with the Church"? The Reformed, we might say if we were being impolite, got around these thorny problems by absolutizing our lack of freedom and responsibility, and relativizing the Church. [That's not fair.--ed.] Oh? I think it is. If you can't find it, you're not guilty of being outside it. That solves one problem. Also, it is granted to be much easier to believe in the Church as the spotless bride of Christ if none of these terrible collections of people is put forward as the actual intended. Pardon me for being rude, but I've never known an invisible pillar in my entire life. If I were you, I wouldn't trust the guy promising to build your house on an invisible foundation, either. True, it didn't stop the Westminster assembly from trying to have it both ways on the matter. Not that it'd help if they chose the visible, because the fractions in that family allegedly following the same will would be hilarious, if it weren't so sad (and confusing). I do have to salute them, though; at one point, they were as opposed to 'toleration' as any medieval papist, and probably worse. They'd surely freak out if they saw what passes for 'normal' in ecclesiology today. Man, I didn't come to talk about that, either. I can't encapsulate the core of a really big problem any better than this. It doesn't commend the solution as obvious, true; still, it deserves a real answer, now.
Late-Night Haiku X.2

Just around the way
Is the felicitous plan,
Your guidance flawless.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Late-Night Haiku IX.2

Shine O sun, fade not;
August does not dim your beams;
Grass laments the days.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Late-Night Haiku VIII

O God, judge of all,
Rain down mercy upon us;
They dwell in caves here.