Safe Haven

That means the Cardinals are vying for another World Series title. We're just going to beat them. You can feel that Boston doesn't have a chance. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong, but I have seen Cardinals playoff teams before, and this team scares me the most. They have no holes. Sure, they can lose on any day, but you don't say, "So-and-so has to play way above his level if we're going to win." You say, "These guys can beat you 1000 ways. Any one of them could be the hero." What people don't realize is that in 2004, the greatest Cardinals team ever--who won 105 of 162 regular season games that year--lost ace Chris Carpenter going into the postseason. Woody Williams started Game 1 on the mound for them. Woody was underrated his entire career, but he's no Chris Carpenter. And the Red Sox had just become the first team to win a best-of-seven series after trailing 3-0 to the Yankees in the LCS. Most of the country--influenced by the Eastern me...

Read . And the entirety of one political party exists for the promotion of the murder of children, and part of the other one isn't sure what it thinks. Do you realize you're going to die one day? It could be soon. We don't know. And when you do, your money, your fun, and your plans will mean two things: Jack and Squat. What matters? Love. Love endures. Do you seriously have so much to do that we can't even get sex right anymore? For the moment, forget the God question. Why are we so afraid of sex? We're so scared of it, it must be tightly controlled. We must use it entirely for pleasure, that momentary "AHA!" most of us know and love. Wouldn't want to just let nature take its course, and see what happens. Oh, no! If we do that, a family and joy might break out. Don't you know you're much more valuable as a cog in a soulless corporation? I am beside myself.

5. I successfully resisted all these temptations to buy a Ronco electric food dehydrator. Honestly. I hear "homemade beef jerky," and I just lose it. 4. What on Earth is wrong with Peyton Manning? 3. Wes. Welker. 2. What on Earth is wrong with Tom Brady? 1. Oh, wait. It's the World Series. I don't care about football.