Safe Haven

 If memory serves, her birthday was March 1. And if I have my years right, she died in 2018, just before she would have turned 93. I saw her a few months before she died. When I think about being a Kettinger, she’s who I think of, along with my father and his siblings, both here, and in the hereafter. One of my brothers is not known for his churchgoing, but he read a Scripture at the Funeral Mass. Nailed it. I have never nailed anything like that in my life. It’s a bit hard to describe my career in simple terms, but if someone described me as a professional Bible reader, I couldn’t deny it. I still couldn’t have done it as well as my brother did that day. At some point, the faithful were invited to sing “On Eagles’ Wings.” I’ve always loved it, but now it’s forever associated with all the love I received from my grandmother, and the courageous life she lived. A dear friend said that he caught the priest rolling his eyes when the hymn started, but he sang it with gusto, like he wrot...

 I happen to believe that the fundamental principle of the Reformation, consistently applied, leads all the way to naturalism-atheism. Private judgment, encapsulated in Sola Scriptura. Blessedly, most people have no interest in severing every possible connection between themselves and the Catholic Church, if they are Christians. And as I work with Barthian Butler, and we talk about how to do ministry together, Sola Scriptura means practically, “We’re gonna mine this divinely inspired written word for everything it has,” not, “Let’s go evangelize the Catholics, before the Whore of Babylon leads them into Hell.” Dr. Cross is right, though: if your lexical tools and your hermeneutical method make it near-impossible to consider full communion with the Catholic Church, those things of themselves lead away from reunion, by the nature of the case. I bring this up with the haze from my recent arguments just beginning to clear. Remember Rachel Held Evans? (Eternal rest…) And she deserved so...

 I should probably be afraid of Italians with mustaches. Or men that wear sleeveless shirts and drive Camaros. I was beaten severely and verbally abused mere minutes after I heard Bobby McFerrin’s “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” on the radio. No one would blame me, if I never wanted to hear it again. (It’s fine. A delightful song. Don’t worry. I’m happy. See what I did there?) If by some tragedy I started killing Italian men with mustaches who drove Camaros, a profiler would probably dig that up. Someone might even argue that I deserve some consideration, in light of my trauma. But I don’t have the right to generalize my trauma to those others. To use a lesser example, I don’t have the right to slander Italian guys with mustaches in general. My last blog post was probably overstated, as was the Facebook post that prompted it. To the extent that the overstatement was unwarranted, I acknowledge that, and regret the error. A lot of darkness can hide behind a pleasing facade. Beyond finding ou...

 And look, I’m not married. I’ve never been married. I have no children. I didn’t choose that; things just worked out that way. If you must know, I haven’t had sexual intercourse either. I probably should say “coitus,” so I am not arguing with some progressive activist about what “sexual intercourse” means. But I figured out from influencer videos or something what a “dead bedroom” was. Unless a couple mutually agrees that they don’t want to have sex/coitus anymore (hopefully to pray and serve) this is usually bad. I’ve known enough couples that it’s probably an indicator of trouble, especially for couples who are still able to have children. Is it really that wild to at least hope that Mr. and Mrs. Vance love each other? That a fourth child yet born at least might indicate that they enjoy each other?  Children are definitely not responsible for their parents’ happiness. That’s absolutely true. But wouldn’t any child hope their parents were happy, when they came into being? As...

 When I actually started college, the year started with “19.” When I returned to the big university, the son of a president had just defeated Al Gore, Jr. to have the privilege of becoming president himself. The inauguration was a few days into the new semester. About 9 months later, some radical monsters hijacked some airplanes and changed the world forever. I knew this kid from the dorm—I’m sorry, “residence hall”—who thought I was intriguing because I was profoundly disabled but a fire-breathing conservative Republican. He needed to find out how in the Sam Hill that could possibly happen. And he had that verbal dexterity that you find among liberal college kids. I’m the kid who correctly read the word “acrylic” when I was 9 on some intelligence test. My uncle handed me The Fountainhead at around the same time. Don’t get it twisted: As a Christian and Catholic theologian today, I could and would grind Ayn Rand’s whole philosophy to dust. But I was 13 when I actually finished Anth...

 For my entire life, the quickest way to be a “moderate Republican” according to the media is to support abortion. That’s it. Now, in the 21st century, it’s “gay/trans rights” as well, or something similar. No interesting economic theories or ideas will do it. Even though bloody Ronald Reagan himself nearly got 60 percent of the public to vote for him, he can’t be a moderate. The only time you hear about a “conservative Democrat” is when the media doesn’t like that person. They probably think that businesses should earn profits to some degree. If you do that, the mainstream media will treat you like the bad guys in FernGully. Religion and traditional views of human sexuality are interrelated, but there is no causal relationship between the two. A big problem for Democrats is that faithful believers perceive them to be hostile to traditional religion. I guess they don’t mind religion, as long as the candidates go to Rainbow Sparkles Open-Minded Community Church. Which, I don’t care;...

 I’m the biggest fan in a certain sense, because my brain and heart is a startlingly impressive catalog of (mostly) American popular music. I could have been a DJ. I haven’t heard everything by any means, but I’ve heard a lot. Even some of you who proverbially live under a pop culture rock [Bryan Cross.—ed.] may have heard of our actual leader, Empress of The Free World, Taylor Swift. What many do not know is that she is named after a notable musician of much older vintage, James Taylor. I’ll just say that probably his fans and fans of Bob Dylan could duke it out for the question of who is America’s greatest living songwriter. Mr. Taylor in fact is so influential that a young boy growing up in Oklahoma put on his records (and others) and dreamed of being a singer. When the boy made good, he changed music forever, selling over 200 million LPs in about 10 years, and taking the “Country” radio format from a niche to outright competing with the biggest stars in rock history. We know th...

 I’ve got a buddy, Jeremy Tate, trying to displace the ACT and maybe the whole College Board, with the Classical Learning Test. Let’s be blunt: it’s marketed toward college bound classically educated and homeschooled students whose families believe that the public school curriculum is deficient and ideological. Let me say that a perceived ideological bias is one argument, and perceived deficiencies in curriculum are another argument. But in the unfortunate ideological sorting that happens today, that gets conflated by almost everyone. If I’m honest, some sharp kid could have figured out that I’ve been a partisan, but also all over the place. They might have figured out that I probably would agree more with Zora Neale Hurston than Toni Morrison. Maybe. I never told them what they should think, but I was a really open book, myself. They might have thought it odd that I talked about sacrifice and communal meals as important rituals in world religions, as seen in The Odyssey. I don’t c...

 I saw a clip once recently of Jordan Peterson, talking about teaching. He said something like, “Teaching is not primarily about the transmission of knowledge; it’s about setting the intellectual frame, and dramatizing the act of learning.” And he’s right. If I could communicate on some level that what we’re learning is meaningful and important to me, that’s when I was most effective. I might be wrong in some respects about teaching primary students, but the goal for even them is eventually self-directed learning, with the ultimate meaning of the information determined by the students. I taught emerging young adults, and Peterson teaches young adults in university. A computer can correct a factual mistake, programmed correctly. A teacher tells the story of why the facts and data matter. It need not mean the same thing to the students as it does to the teacher, but if you tell them, “What you make of it is up to you,” and they believe you, you’re going to have enormously motivated s...

 I’ll try to be nice. Shouldn’t be that hard. I don’t think I’ve had any persistently negative thoughts about her. She’s beautiful. She is. I hadn’t fully decided to abstain from voting for president until very late that year she became the Democratic nominee, and I’ll just admit that I never minded seeing her on the TV. I’m just girl crazy, and that’s never going to change. I have been completely in love with three women in my life (possibly four) whilst having those feelings returned in some respect. Two out of the three were Black, or from the Indian subcontinent. Harris is both at once. I imagine that twenty years ago, she had most men tripping all over themselves. Mr. Emhoff has learned some grace for these guys (and probably some women) because unless Michelle Obama walks in, he’s the envy of the room. She seemed nervous on a national stage to me. I do think that potentially becoming the second Black president and the first woman president adds a special pressure that we coul...