Safe Haven

 That’s me. [Jesus would be Michael Corleone. Also, he’s definitely not going to kill you whilst you fish.—ed.] It’s an analogy, OK? Plus, if he did happen to say, “He’s got a good heart, but he’s stupid and weak,” I couldn’t possibly argue with that characterization. Puzo and Coppola wrote brilliant screenplays for both films, and I am reading the book now. These two films are among the greatest ever produced, and I think it’s 100 percent true to say that authentic Christianity is in the background. If it weren’t, the famous baptism scene where Michael is taking baptismal vows for Michael Rizzi while the Corleone henchmen kill the other heads of the Five Families on his orders wouldn’t work. It relies on our moral intuition that this is the absolute height of hypocrisy. Hypocrisy is also in view at the beginning of the second film, when Senator Cleary, played by regarded character actor G. D. Spradlin, delivers a slur-infused invective against Michael Corleone after playing the ki...

 Taylor Swift is suitably liberal, so she’s probably safe from being cancelled by our “betters.” But I remember when they used Kanye’s little protest on behalf of Beyoncé to try to argue that Beyoncé was being overlooked because of her race. Yeah, that lady, who’s won every award known to humanity (basically) and has more money in her couch cushions than I will ever make. And I am not saying that she’s never faced anything heinous. I wouldn’t even try to say that. What I will say is that progressive white women especially will make a cause out of anything or anyone, even if it’s dumb. Kanye West is a mentally unwell Nazi-loving Trump supporter, so they’ll send that little incident down the memory hole, since it’s not useful anymore. But I remember, and I don’t plan on letting certain people forget it conveniently.

 The comedian Neal Brennan has a bit about how Republicans welcome anyone who says they want to be a Republican. Liberals? Not so much. “Hey, I’m liberal, too!” “Really? We’ll see.” Josh Johnson has a similar bit. Both audiences laughed, because they know it’s true.

 When I was about 20, I used to read him on occasion. I was Reformed, and a Federal Vision sympathizer. Of course I was; I didn’t know it, but I was a writer. And if you’re a little bit artsy-fartsy like that, you’re a crypto-Catholic, even if you’re not ready to submit to Rome. It’s legit a kind of Oxford Movement within Reformed theology; that’s what it was; that’s what it is. I was smart enough to know that Western civilization is Catholic civilization. America is a bit anomalous, but let’s be real: the Anglican Communion at the time of the death of St. Thomas More was just the SSPX of its day: Catholics separated from their visible Head on Earth. Anyway, I laughed at a lot at the Wilson snark, because even a lot of liberal Christians at the time acted like President Bush was a Christian Ayatollah. C’mon, man. This dude from Old Money, whose relatives seemingly own a third of New England? Other than the Calvinist Congregationalists, the region is not known for its excess of reli...

 With due respect to Lichtman, external factors are just background most years. If a substantial portion of people think you hate them, criticism of the candidate who sits back and says, “They hate you, see that?” goes precisely nowhere. I could even grant you that the sitting president is like an internet comment section, like Cliff from Cheers without the sneaky smarts.  I would even grant you that staffing a ton of the executive branch with right-wing radio hosts is highly questionable. It’s the exact thing a TV president who is out of his depth would do. But the Democratic Party’s counterpart to Cliff Clavin was…Tim Walz? An alleged football coach who doesn’t know what a “pick six” is? Not to mention that a guy who is father to a Downs Syndrome son sounds foolish defending unfettered abortion rights. If it’s really true that you believe Republican efforts to restrict abortion access have unanticipated bad effects, handle it legislatively. Trump/Vance on abortion are first-...

 “Kamala Harris cares about they/them. Donald Trump cares about you.” A couple things: I won’t cynically say that a politician doesn’t care about anyone; I don’t know that. Heck, I called George W. Bush the “Comforter-In-Chief” (before some jackwagon at USA Today stole it) and I wasn’t kidding. That second sentence I don’t personally believe. I have to work hard to praise the man. But anyway. This was the crowning moment. Whoever wrote this deserves a place teaching in the Obama-Atwater School of Effective Political Destruction. Harris could recite “The New Colossus” whilst weaning a flock of baby bald eagles with Lee Greenwood singing “God Bless The USA” to no effect. It was over. And it was perfectly emblematic. Normal people don’t spend time worrying about being transphobic. It’s essentially a meaningless word, coined yet again by people who talk exclusively to each other. If I promise not to say “progressive academics,” will you send me money? This is distinct, by the way, from...

 22 years ago in an essay, I said that I preferred Bush 43 to be re-elected president, for lots of policy reasons. But on a personal note, the Democrats acted like our country itself was a gulag, and we were all allegedly locked in it. Happy warriors usually win; dour people embarrassed for the very country they intend to govern usually don’t. In the interest of principled criticism, I definitely know that “enhanced interrogation” and the abuse of terrorist militants violates longstanding human rights commitments. In the present day, ICE detentions that ignore judicial orders to obey habeas corpus have a gulag-adjacent quality. Any lawyer advocating for basic human rights can say anything they want. I didn’t vote for Donald Trump; I didn’t appoint Stephen Miller. This is quite apart from illegal immigration, and the probable likelihood that any such people also are violent criminals. In other words, when ICE agents are protecting Americans and guests from monsters along with other ...

 There was a lot of social science in my electives then. Political science and economics were a blast, but I filled it all out with enough sociology and religious studies that I nearly had minors in both. Sociology was explicitly Marxist. In fact, a lot of those were taught by European immigrants. The only people more self-righteous than American leftists are European leftists. As you may know, religious studies became essentially religious sociology or cultural anthropology after the rise of the New Left in the late 1960s. Studying dogma and religious texts was left to the benighted believers in their churches and seminaries. I still liked a lot of it, but I was often angry and arrogant then. I got saved in 1997. “Deconstruction” meant Marxist dismissal of white and male certitudes from the modern era, and an assertion that some need for power completely explains every contention. But philosophically, if every truth claim is a grasp for power, that’s emotivism: personal gain or de...

 The Democratic Party isn’t winning the presidency lately. I’m going to put a language warning right here. Sometimes, a vulgar word or words is the clearest way to say something. Donald Trump has been described as a carnival barker. I happen to think that is an insult to carnival barkers. He’s a self-involved amoral beast who was born leading off of third base. The only real difference between Bernie Madoff and Donald Trump is that Madoff went broke. If you have money—even if you borrowed it—you don’t have to be bound by anything, and this man isn’t. That said, I don’t believe a whole bunch of left-wing garbage, and most people don’t. Trump is a bullshitter, when he’s not doing something awful or illegal. But if you think about who votes in America, it’s probably a guy about 55, white, named Steve or Ron or Jim. That’s your median voter. I am not him; Tom Darrow and I are too throughly Christian to be the median voter. Most Americans identify as Christian, but Jim’s not a disciple,...

 I will still say that The Lion King is my favorite film, because it helps me process and heal from losing my father, without completely breaking me. Interstellar just breaks me, and if it weren’t so profoundly Christian, I wouldn’t recommend it to everyone I’ve known. I have watched it 5 times, and I will only watch it again if I am sharing it with someone. I don’t hurt myself on purpose, even if pain can be good. Matthew McConaughey may be a funny guy who has done comedy and chick flicks, but when he wanted to avoid being typecast to move into drama, he did it exactly right. He won his Academy Award for Dallas Buyers Club, but Interstellar was the announcement that he would win one. Nobody will ever take the respect that comes with that, and no one should try. It feels sort of cheap to call it “entertainment,” though I suppose it is. My Blu-Ray sits in a box; my streaming copy has never been watched.  What could I possibly say to those actors, without melting into a puddle? ...

 I was going in thinking about Interstellar and Arrival, because those sci-fi films are intentional dramas. And the Nolan brothers write, produce, and direct with the intention of producing an emotional response. If you have seen Interstellar, you know. There’s always a risk of being cheap and mawkish with that effort, but I think both Interstellar and Arrival earn their payoffs with characters we care about and costs that aren’t repaid neatly. This film kind of sets us up for something similar: Hero goes on an apparent suicide mission to save the world. He finds more than he bargained for. He’s reluctant. It jumps around in time to fill in the background. But this film replaces the sorrow with humor and a kind of plucky optimism. It’s not like self-sacrifice is absent; not at all. But “Coop” saves the world FOR his kids, Tom and Murph. In a way, the world IS Tom and Murph. Love drives him. Grace had no one on Earth; he found a purpose in deep space. He didn’t even willingly go. Wh...

 Billy Joel has a hit song called, “Only The Good Die Young.” It’s catchy, but it’s scandalous. If you stop dancing for five seconds, you realize it’s about enticing a young Catholic teen girl to fornicate. I didn’t write it; I am just the messenger. Yeah, Billy, if Catholic girls start much too late, they have good Dads. Anyway, I have noticed that indeed the good do die very young sometimes. You’ve seen it often enough; people who teach you that you’re not grateful enough. People will still decide God is a monster, and I have varying degrees of pity or sympathy, depending on those circumstances. But I understand now. I’m paying attention. Happiness is fleeting here; joy abides, and it is for others. Hand me a Coke or a Mountain Dew, I am happy. Frankly, I will probably arbitrarily decide you’re a good person. Abiding joy goes through me, even if I suffer. Nothing merely human produces abiding joy. You need a relationship with Jesus for that. “It is no longer I who live, but Chris...

 Even in these latter times, tons of safeguards have been added to our penal system, so that instances of capital punishment aren’t seen as barbarism. Doubtless, even some people who in some objective moral sense deserved it were people who reformed their lives—such as they were—and took responsibility for what they did. Let me back up and say that it could never have been intrinsically evil, that is, evil in its very object. Holy Mother Church executed enough notorious murderers that she wasn’t about to impugn her moral authority. By God’s grace, the Catholic Church remains the last best hope for humanity, not only for eternal salvation in Christ, but for a society worth living in. Too many people think even high-level theology and ethics is a Choose Your Own Adventure Book. And that Church discussion is just politics with a longer timescale. I have no time for that, re: capital punishment. We’re even caught between the dignity of the condemned, and the barbarism of their acts. Th...