Safe Haven

"Inspiration porn" refers to material about people with disabilities where the primary focus is either on the "AB" caregivers and their emotional responses to us living our lives, or is some voyueristic exploitation of some struggle we have, to make "normals" feel good about themselves. I truly do understand why it's a problem, and why it can be demeaning. As one TED speaker put it in paraphrase, I'm not a hero for getting out of bed this morning. On the other hand... A cross is a cross. If someone says to me, "You inspire me," charity requires that my first instinct should be to take him or her at face value. Have you ever noticed all the dying and disabled kids who love sports teams? You might wonder why. The secret is this: Weakness, inability, and failure is a reminder of creatureliness and mortality. Athletic glory and victory is a reminder of the perfection of Heaven. If someone pays you this compliment, stand in awe. Yes, your ...

Yes, it exists. I'm starting to own it. Took me long enough. There is of course an idolatry of sex, and an idolatry of "normal" or "able," and I have been guilty of both at times. "If I don't end up with a normal girl, then I'll never be totally me, or attain my goal." "I don't want a disabled girl." Both of these are false, properly speaking. There is the mystery of chastity, and I have discovered a wonderful thing: You can't really properly order your sexuality, integrating it into the whole of your being, unless and until you acknowledge it is there, and that it's really not that different than anyone else's. All this being said, some of you are quite aware that I have not seen fit to limit my romantic aspirations to the disabled. Ahem. Honestly, I hope it makes someone uncomfortable, so that I have someone to share the awkwardness with! Seriously though, you might consider why it makes you uncomfortable, ...