Friday, October 26, 2012

5 Things I'm Waiting For In Las Vegas

5. On the plane, someone catches sight of Vegas in the distance, and yells out, "Vegas, Baby!!! Yeah!" to raucous applause.

4. Poker. Yes, poker. It's Vegas.

3. Good food, and a possible Wayne Newton sighting. Or Donny Osmond. Don't you judge me.

2. The Sacrament of Reconciliation. In Vegas. How poetic is that?

1. Garth Brooks.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

5 Intemperate Thoughts On Politics

5. I agree that God is not a Republican, as long as you agree that he's not Barack Obama.

4. How bad is Obama? Bad enough that a liberal from Massachusetts who doesn't even believe in the Trinity is winning. And has my vote.

3. I don't think 47% percent of the country is lazy; I think 47% of the country is stupid.

2. No, you intellectual infant, "free exercise" is not a coupon for Gold's Gym.

1. If you stick a Scripture verse on stupid leftist crap, it's still stupid leftist crap.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Sometimes, all you need is grace and Taco Bell. Emphasis on the grace. My mind is still a fog. I'm reading the words, but I don't understand what they mean. I hate when that happens.

I'm not cut out for spending huge amounts of time alone. Unfortunately, this is what you do when you're in a non-traditional Masters program. Nor am I cut out for the single life. I could hear St. Ignatius prattle on about "disordered desires" all day long, and all I can think is things you shouldn't say to saints.

It's not that I can't picture some other calling, but I can't and won't take a vow that I don't stand a reasonable chance of keeping. I'm a scandal waiting to happen. I'm just telling you that. And frankly, I didn't enjoy the idea of pastoral ministry all that much, anyway. I love God. I love his Word. I remember things most people don't. That makes me a good dude to have at a trivia night, not a shepherd.

I've been bouncing through life thinking I must be crazy, and searching for assurances to the contrary. And if I am crazy, isn't my future wife supposed to say, "Yep, you're crazy, but I love you anyway"? Isn't that what God says to all of us?

Me and "The Deb" get along so well because our kind of crazy makes sense. We're not really "The Cool People," although we want to be. The truth is, maybe we're not the crazy ones. I think we see the good things people don't see about themselves, and they miss those things in us, because they're looking only at the outside.

That's just it: me and Deb are just really different than most people. But we can't be other than who we are. But "Normal" people and crazy people need love just the same. You just have to decide whether you are going to do that. Suppose the thing that made you 'acceptable' went away. Would you still want people to love and accept you? Better question: If that acceptance is based on something material, something completely beyond your doing, is it real?

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Physically and spiritually sick people both need to submit to the reality of the situation. Like Rich Mullins said, we are not as strong as we think we are. For the record, I let the Cardinals imploding affect me more than I should have.

But this cold has me in worse shape than I thought. I didn't even finish watching the recording of the debate, the third and final between the contestants for the White House. That's a bonafide scandal, if you know me at all.

My friend Mucinex is a jerk. He's huge, and he doesn't listen. My only solution for friends like this is to keep trying, until they go where they are told. Water is a must.

Let me know that you're out there. We all need somebody to lean on. I feel slightly subhuman at the moment. I'm gonna pray and watch a movie.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

I can neither get healthy, nor stop listening to George Michael. [There's obviously a correlation.--ed.] Shut up. Seriously, I don't know anyone short of Michael Jackson who has damaged the legacy of their glorious pop music more than George Michael.

Yes, some of it is very sexual. And yes, he is a homosexual. And there are other problems in his life; I get that. But he makes music that brings me joy, and even makes me think sometimes. I'm never going to be one of those people who hangs out in "holy huddles." If you're one of those people, no disrespect, but you may not like it here.

Here he is in a back-up vocal role with his bass player Deon Estus, from the group he co-founded, Wham! Here's his biggest hit.

Here's my favorite song of George's.

Done and done. Sue me.