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I was thinking about Counting Crows, and this great batch of lines from a song of note: She looks up at the building/says she's thinkin' a jumpin'/she says she's tired of life/she must tired of somethin'. I can think of exactly twice in my whole life when the thought of ending it all crossed my mind. (That still probably means there's something horribly wrong with me. Fine.) But it's weird how Jesus being Lord is this ever-present reality saying, "No!" to that kind of thinking. I didn't even know or belong to Jesus that first time. But somebody told me somehow that I'd miss out on something important, that my life had true consequence. Our true hope in life is resurrection and consummation. It's not really religious or theological at all in the end. Just reality.
I'm not even remotely sad about anything, in case you're wondering. I was just reflecting on how pain and suffering has seemed to bring clarity to me in my life. Because we all seem to be yearning for love, to receive it, to give it, don't you think? At the margins, we disagree about what love is at times, but just like Supreme Court Justices watching porn, we know it when we see it.
What is the last day, if not the ultimate victory of (God) Love? The hard part is convincing people (ahem, myself) where the true love resides. We have this intuition for it, but it's wildly inconsistent. Left to ourselves, we'd never find love. I'm casting my lot with Jesus again, right now. Each day, I see myself turning elsewhere for love, etc. but it ends with no finality, no victory.
Maybe I am a fool, but the Jesus I read about in the New Testament seems capable of keeping promises. Worth betting on. I can't get it out of my head: "What if this thing [the NT] is true?" (If so, that old covenant is true also.) So, if I were to announce the truth of these covenants, that God is real and has spoken, and will judge the world, it doesn't seem like there's room to be the societal glue social scientists are always claiming preachers have been. Good thing, seems harder than teaching from the Bible. Thus concludes a long winding treatise about nothing.

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