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5 Things To Do On Labor Day, 2009

5. Count the hours to the Cards-Brewers matchup, lamenting the soul-crushing loss in Pittsburgh yesterday.

4. Wonder what whitewashed, commie-free version of Labor Day the History Channel will present.

3. Paranoidly wonder what collectivist inanity the government is planning.

2. Recall amusedly that the collectivist plots will likely be undone by Joe Biden's big mouth.

1. Trust in Jesus, whose labor gives my labor meaning on this, and every, day.

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