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I Am Not A Maniac

The truth is, before the accident, I was carefree. Getting hit by a car while "walking" was a running joke. It still is, it's just way darker now! Anyway, I get scared now. They tell me it will pass, and maybe it will, but frankly, I've had close calls since. I don't mean to scare you. People turn, and they don't look. Why would you not look? We have well-marked crosswalks here. I do check for turn signals on cars, but if you don't signal, you're going to kill someone. No, you can't sneak that quick turn in. Just don't.

And let's get something out in the open: when you see a person in a wheelchair on the street, you probably think, "How great to see a person with those challenges out and about!" I'm just walking. I have things to do; I don't have time to engage in pity parties, or your inspirational reverie. Point is, we're out here, there are a lot of us, and you need to look.

I live in a building with 80 other people, and maybe 60 of us are disabled. This is one building on one street, in a medium city. Pay attention. Your life can't be that busy. Killing someone in your car will slow it down.

Strangely enough, had I been a walking pedestrian, death might have been even more likely.

So, I'm not walking to Mass without an "AB" along (let the reader understand). I'd love to tell you that will be a temporary thing, but it's not the way I feel right now.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Jason,

It isn't easy being a pedestrian. I use public transportation everyday and crossing streets can be down right scary. And I agree with your sentiment on turn signals. People either don't bother to use them or they turn them on the moment they start turning, which is unhelpful. And I won't bother to get into rolling stops or drivers who run red lights. People just don't care enough about pedestrians.

In terms of moving forward psychologically, that may a take a while. I was in a car accident about two years ago and I'm pretty much now just getting comfortable with getting in a car, depending on the driver. For the longest time I had to close my eyes in the car and say a rosary just to feel safe. My situation wasn't the same as yours but it was pretty traumatic for a person who doesn't drive. Just take it a minute at a time if you have to and do what's going to work for you to cross those streets.

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Nathan said…
Do you have reflectors or nighttime lights on your chair? It could make the difference between a distracted or night-blind driver noticing and not noticing.
Jason said…
We will be making said modifications, though I don't cross the street after sundown, basically. And I was struck in broad daylight, sadly.

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