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5 Thoughts For The Day

5. Scott Rolen is having a monster baseball season at the age of 35. He's always been one of my favorite players, and would be a Hall of Famer if not for injuries.

4. Day 1 of the "new plan." No, this does not involve women.

3. I have made it through the day without listening to Barry Manilow. [Yeah, but "Mandy" was playing in your head.--ed.]

2. I didn't even know this song until last year, and I love it. Heard it on imeem.com. (Curse you, Myspace!) He's earned a hearing beyond his famous signature song. Warning to Tim: I will be finding one of his abums from the '90s or '00s and giving it a listen to write a review. Yes, I've heard the original. It's too slow to make the intriguing lyrics jump out at you. But congrats for writing a great song, dudes.

1. I heard yelling out my door, and then a doorbell ring with a knock. But I didn't get there fast enough. Hope they weren't selling something.

[Actually Germane Side-Rant: I can't believe that remake in #2 only hit #22 on the charts. Maybe there's three types of hit songs: 1) "We're going to remember and love this one forever." 2) "Wow, this song is irritating but memorable, and we're going to share it together." 3) "Who the jimmy are the people who like this horrible song?" Maybe tucked in the mid-twenties are all the songs people would really like if they weren't so ADHD about things. Furthermore, it's probably catchy, but not overly so, so if you heard it 10 years later, you wouldn't want to harm yourself or others at the first note. My theory, anyway. Tangent Within The Rant: "My Heart Will Go On" is a song I always will utterly hate that still is, admittedly, performed vocally rather well. There are 3 main problems with this song: 1) It is the theme to perhaps the most overrated film of all time; 2) the lyrics make no sense; 3) you have to dose yourself with Celine, or you will be prone to stab yourself in the eye with sharp objects, but it was EVERYWHERE. Alright, I have to call out one of my own on this one also: "Hero" by Mariah Carey is rank Gnostic heresy. Look, I'm definitely an "MC" fan, muted only slightly by her descent into, well, porn, since 1995. But I gotta call it like I see it. [Did you notice that Walter Afanasieff is involved with both songs you hate?--ed.] Yes. I feel the same about Wally's songwriting as I do Diane Warren's: ambiguous. And I mean, I think I have some sappy song "street cred," so it isn't that. Maybe I have no idea what I'm saying.]

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