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Disabled Sexuality, Not An Oxymoron

Yes, it exists. I'm starting to own it. Took me long enough. There is of course an idolatry of sex, and an idolatry of "normal" or "able," and I have been guilty of both at times.

"If I don't end up with a normal girl, then I'll never be totally me, or attain my goal."

"I don't want a disabled girl."

Both of these are false, properly speaking. There is the mystery of chastity, and I have discovered a wonderful thing: You can't really properly order your sexuality, integrating it into the whole of your being, unless and until you acknowledge it is there, and that it's really not that different than anyone else's.

All this being said, some of you are quite aware that I have not seen fit to limit my romantic aspirations to the disabled. Ahem. Honestly, I hope it makes someone uncomfortable, so that I have someone to share the awkwardness with!

Seriously though, you might consider why it makes you uncomfortable, if it does. You may want to sit down for this.

Everything works.

I'm saying this here and now, so I don't have to be crude at bars and parties. As far as I know, there's no reason why I couldn't marry validly in the Catholic Church. [Aside from the fact that you don't go to bars or parties.--ed.] So true.

There was a badly deformed guy for whatever reason--I can't recall his disability--who used a prostitute to feel "whole." I don't recommend that, but I understand it. Oh, boy, do I understand it! I think like many other disabled people, we experience a lack of touch in general. I wonder if people are thinking they're going to catch something? Anyway, that's weird.

I probably just committed some heinous faux pas with "badly deformed." Oh, well. I guess I should say that actually, I am looking forward to the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Which is not to say that I'm sad about my body, or its limitations. It's just that I appreciate all the things you "ABs" can do with yours. I have the soul of an athlete, absolutely. Had I started earlier, I definitely think I would have been involved in several wheelchair sports.

Where I think activists are going off the wheelchair ramp, so to speak, is that sexual sin is sin. As much as I can appreciate the "freedom" of fornication, in the sense that a fully sexual body has been acknowledged and seen in some way, it's still well short of what God is calling us to.

Truthfully, I have no idea how I would handle being a faithful Catholic with multiple children, as a person with a disability. Then again, everyone is terrified of parenthood. I have decided to stop being any more terrified than anyone else.
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