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Revisiting "Guess Who's Coming To Dinner?" (1967)

I suppose I am in the mode of revisiting expressions of popular culture as they relate to race, given our present situation. We have a lot to think about, to pray about, and a lot positive that we can hopefully do, in the near future to make things better.

I rewatch this film a lot, as someone who had a brief interracial relationship in the past. In this film of course, the sexes are switched. A white man loving a black woman has other aspects of complexity, most of which I was not frankly aware of at the time.

I love this film, although let me start with the weaknesses. Firstly, John Prentice is the archetype of the perfect black man. Perhaps it was done this way intentionally, but in reality, it's the way you would have to do things--especially in 1967--to get some segment of your audience used to and comfortable with the idea in itself.

If you don't know the story, Joanna "Joey" Drayton comes home from a college break (or something) telling her family that she's gonna get married. Shockingly enough she says she only met him 10 days prior. Oh, and as an added bonus, she's white, and her fiancé is black. The great Sidney Poitier plays John Prentice, Joey's fiancé. Prentice is a well-regarded doctor with the World Health Organization, to say the least. Most relationships don't involve people like John Prentice. Most interracial relationships aren't this ideal. Perhaps that was the point.

The other huge weakness of this movie is that it keeps having all the characters talk about love as a feeling. Most of the characters go on and on about the two main characters, and their feelings for one another, as if that would be enough for anything, much less to survive the racism and discrimination that they would face. Actually, in defense of Mr. Drayton's hesitation, this discrimination and racism is a good reason--if there is one at all--for not dating interracially. And I guess I expect too much from a Hollywood movie, but I would want the Catholic priest in the film to talk about consent, and openness to life, and all the other things required to contract the marriage validly. On the other hand, no one is Catholic in this story except the Monsignor.

As to its strengths, it is delightfully subversive in the fact that the Draytons are committed liberals, who nevertheless have to face their own prejudice and hesitations at the prospect of their daughter marrying a black man. The maid Tillie is a bit stereotypical in some ways, but I appreciated her opposition as a reflection of her generation's fears about stepping outside the strict racial hierarchy under which many of them must have labored. In that way, the two fathers in the story share Tillie's fears. I still love Hillary getting fired. Katharine Hepburn's speech in firing Hillary is one of my favorite scenes in any movie ever.

I found another weakness. I don't like John's speech in challenging his father. It was heartfelt, but it was harsh. I could never say that to my own father; I would feel as though I had broken the commandment. I also didn't like that it seemed to reflect this naĂŻve notion of "progress". Breaking away from the old ways sometimes is necessary, but by no means is it always good.

We still have so far to go, in that it still seems unique and challenging, common as interracial relationships may be today. The so-called "social" model of disability says that we are more hampered by people's perception of disability then we are by our disabilities themselves. I wonder if there is a similar idea in regard to race? That is not to say that I totally subscribe to the social model of disability, but I have found that it explains some aspects of my interactions with others, and the specific steps that I take to manage a certain danger or discomfort in those interactions. In any case, in regard to race, I wonder if it would help us to have more interracial relationships. It's not impossible, but I have found it is more difficult for people to hate their own families. Suppose George Floyd was my brother-in-law; I'd be more outraged about his death than others may be. I may feel strongly about race issues, because I would see them in my own family. I would see how that discrimination plays out in close proximity. I don't suppose I am required to agree with David French about anything, but he has a certain credibility on these issues, as the parent of a black child, and as one who has personally endured the injury of bigotry, against himself, and against his family.

I still believe that we will be able to change these conversations for the better, when we see everyone as a person, and as someone with whom I could be close. The victims of violence are just names--maybe faces--until they are something more.

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