Skip to main content
No, I Cannot Pray and Chew Gum at the Same Time, Thanks for Asking
I found myself praying for a buddy just now, forgetting that I had a piece of gum in my mouth. It's not that I couldn't do it; it just felt a bit unserious. Father or no, this is still Almighty God we address. I barely wanted to type that. [Oh, smeg, here comes an anti-evengelical rant!--ed.] Have you gotten the distinct feeling you were in a place where people were talking about God in worship, but not to him? 94% of the time, it's not even intentional. But no wonder we're all confused: it seems like everything in evangelicalism I have seen is geared toward some nebulous "seeker" I have never met, or to his comfort and non-offense. And not that this is bad; I want the people who don't yet know Christ to come; I want the people who could know him more deeply (that'd be all of us) to come, too. But if we're not us as Christians, to what or to whom are we drawing these people? If it's even .1% true that "the medium is the message," it stands to reason that we risk confusing ourselves as committed Christians if we toy around too much. Did no one think of this? The whole reason we have loads of anti-church, disaffected (white) Boomers is that, however they were sinned against, those liturgies they grew up with are like emotional or mental super-glue. If Father or Pastor Joe wasn't a good man somehow, "Torch it, we're starting over." And now I'm stuck with your business model. Thanks; thanks a lot. I have no burning urge to kick it old school, as it were; I'm just not very smart. Let's not reinvent the wheel when we're talking life and death. As I've written previously, every church I ever attended or visited gets the same three questions: "Who is God?" "Who am I?" "What are we doing here?" (in life and in Sunday worship) With all due respect, I personally don't care about the talents of your music team, whether you have a men's ministry, or who the youth leader is. [Side Rant: I was at church yesterday, and God love him, I think the pastor gave the worst sermon I ever heard. It's not what he said; it's what he didn't say. And I couldn't figure out why I thought it was so deficient until just now. The thought actually occurred at the time: "Oh no! He just preached 30 minutes as though everyone in this audience is already saved." Not most of us. Not some believing and needing growth, some not. If he said to repent, I don't remember it. If he exalted the glories of the Incarnation or Resurrection, I don't remember it. It was a "vision" sermon. I hate "vision" sermons. And he forgot to read the text! Didn't we go to the same seminary, sir? You just can't do that. That's the homiletical equivalent of something really awful. [You know, that preacher you like, his sermons suck, too. It's like Senior Lit all over again.--ed.] Maybe. But I always can see the highest and the best, and that Jesus is the Way. I may find out later that he "pulled a Biden" (see 1988 Presidential election) on something from a book, but I always say, "Wow, I need to read that book; I didn't know Jesus was in there!" Anyway, at the risk of self-congratulation, it freaked me out when my colleagues said, "You preach like there's mostly unbelievers in the room." And I said, "Well, we have to preach the gospel." If you think about it, is there any of us so unstained by the world that we don't need to hear the first things 8000 times? No. Therefore, I'd say, within the bounds of familiarity and friendship, the message is nearly the same in content, if not in form.] Just give it to me straight, dude. I'm meeting with God, not buying a house.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

My Thoughts On The Harrison Butker Commencement Speech

Update: I read the whole thing. I’m sorry, but what a weirdo. I thought you [Tom Darrow, of Denver, CO] made a trenchant case for why lockdowns are bad, and I definitely appreciated it. But a graduation speech is *not* the place for that. Secondly, this is an august event. It always is. I would never address the President of the United States in this manner. Never. Even the previous president, though he deserves it, if anyone does. Thirdly, the affirmations of Catholic identity should be more general. He has no authority to propound with specificity on all matters of great consequence. It has all the hallmarks of a culture war broadside, and again, a layman shouldn’t speak like this. The respect and reverence due the clergy is *always due,* even if they are weak, and outright wrong. We just don’t brush them aside like corrupt Mafia dons, to make a point. Fourthly, I don’t know where anyone gets the idea that the TLM is how God demands to be worshipped. The Church doesn’t teach that. ...

Dear Alyse

 Today, you’re 35. Or at least you would be, in this place. You probably know this, but we’re OK. Not great, but OK. We know you wouldn’t want us moping around and weeping all the time. We try not to. Actually, I guess part of the problem is that you didn’t know how much we loved you. And that you didn’t know how to love yourself. I hope you have gotten to Love by now. Not a place, but fills everything in every way. I’m not Him, but he probably said, “Dear daughter/sister, you have been terribly hard on yourself. Rest now, and be at peace.” Anyway, teaching is going well, and I tell the kids all about you. They all say you are pretty. I usually can keep the boys from saying something gross for a few seconds. Mom and I are going to the game tonight. And like 6 more times, before I go back to South Carolina. I have seen Nicky twice, but I myself haven’t seen your younger kids. Bob took pictures of the day we said goodbye, and we did a family picture at the Abbey. I literally almost a...

A Friend I Once Had, And The Dogmatic Principle

 I once had a friend, a dear friend, who helped me with personal care needs in college. Reformed Presbyterian to the core. When I was a Reformed Presbyterian, I visited their church many times. We were close. I still consider his siblings my friends. (And siblings in the Lord.) Nevertheless, when I began to consider the claims of the Catholic Church to be the Church Christ founded, he took me out to breakfast. He implied--but never quite stated--that we would not be brothers, if I sought full communion with the Catholic Church. That came true; a couple years later, I called him on his birthday, as I'd done every year for close to ten of them. He didn't recognize my number, and it was the most strained, awkward phone call I have ever had. We haven't spoken since. We were close enough that I attended the rehearsal dinner for his wedding. His wife's uncle is a Catholic priest. I remember reading a blog post of theirs, that early in their relationship, she told him of the p...