I'm going to start a new tag called, "Observations." It's going to be what some call, "observational comedy." I could use a few laughs, and so I'm sure could you. The Editor is sure to make a few appearances. [What?! I mean, yeah, I wasn't paying attention. I was at the fridge.--ed.]
Anyway, have you noticed that a standard-size water bottle contains precisely 16.9 ounces? Not 16. Not 17. An integer would make too much sense. Can you imagine that marketing meeting?
"OK, people. We obviously don't use metric here in the US. How many ounces should we sell at the price we determined?"
"12!"
"16!"
"18!"
[pregnant pause]
"How about 16.9?"
"Genius!"
--
Now, some enterprising soul has noticed that 16.9 ounces is precisely 500 milliliters. So we've caved to our European betters after all. I have a couple of questions here, though. Does anyone know why we don't just go metric? Moreover, did someone study how much water people like to drink, and conclude that 500 mL was appropriate? Why not 503? We have 12 ounce, 16 ounce, and 20 ounce sodas. No one there worries that the volume in mL is not round. Why water?
Speaking of soda, the powers that be will sell them in any size you want, and oddly keep the serving size (1) the same, for the most part. That's not very helpful, really. They do it for the calorie and sugar watchers among us. But it's kind of insulting sometimes. Once I get to 80 percent or so of something the government says is "bad," I've left the compound. No one is buying Hungry Man or Banquet frozen dinners with a deep commitment to "healthy eating."
It's all garbage, anyway, those numbers. I sometimes laugh out loud. It probably would anger a cardiologist somewhere. Look man, I'm not trying to deface this temple, per se. But honestly, I think some of these "clean food" types are lying. You have not learned to appreciate kale, and I know it. Pizza Hut and Doritos taste good. You might be able to convince me to eat something else, but I will never say I don't like them.
On the other hand, I've become a foodie in some ways, a real snob. After a few dishes with words like "demi" and "reduction" in them, going to McDonald's is like buying a salt brick and eating it like a popsicle. I wonder if you can get that in the 16.9 ounce size?
Anyway, have you noticed that a standard-size water bottle contains precisely 16.9 ounces? Not 16. Not 17. An integer would make too much sense. Can you imagine that marketing meeting?
"OK, people. We obviously don't use metric here in the US. How many ounces should we sell at the price we determined?"
"12!"
"16!"
"18!"
[pregnant pause]
"How about 16.9?"
"Genius!"
--
Now, some enterprising soul has noticed that 16.9 ounces is precisely 500 milliliters. So we've caved to our European betters after all. I have a couple of questions here, though. Does anyone know why we don't just go metric? Moreover, did someone study how much water people like to drink, and conclude that 500 mL was appropriate? Why not 503? We have 12 ounce, 16 ounce, and 20 ounce sodas. No one there worries that the volume in mL is not round. Why water?
Speaking of soda, the powers that be will sell them in any size you want, and oddly keep the serving size (1) the same, for the most part. That's not very helpful, really. They do it for the calorie and sugar watchers among us. But it's kind of insulting sometimes. Once I get to 80 percent or so of something the government says is "bad," I've left the compound. No one is buying Hungry Man or Banquet frozen dinners with a deep commitment to "healthy eating."
It's all garbage, anyway, those numbers. I sometimes laugh out loud. It probably would anger a cardiologist somewhere. Look man, I'm not trying to deface this temple, per se. But honestly, I think some of these "clean food" types are lying. You have not learned to appreciate kale, and I know it. Pizza Hut and Doritos taste good. You might be able to convince me to eat something else, but I will never say I don't like them.
On the other hand, I've become a foodie in some ways, a real snob. After a few dishes with words like "demi" and "reduction" in them, going to McDonald's is like buying a salt brick and eating it like a popsicle. I wonder if you can get that in the 16.9 ounce size?
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