The Spotify algorithm knows me well. 1980s and 1990s pop and R&B. It was a time when pop and adult contemporary were the same songs. Jimmy Jam & Terry Lewis made their bones in this time, somehow making a mark as songwriters and producers contemporaneously with the legendary Babyface. (Kenneth Edmonds) Jam and Lewis introduced the music world to Janet Jackson principally, though that is in no way exhaustive of their contributions.
They wrote and produced the ballad “Let’s Wait Awhile” from the 1986 LP Control. It concerns a young woman telling her boyfriend that she isn’t ready to have sex. Now, the younger sister of Michael Jackson was only 20 years old in 1986. Doubtless many of her fans were younger.
The question is, why? What are we waiting for? A lot of scary red pill types go on and on about not wanting a woman who’s “ran through,” but what’s the point? 20 is too young, but 22 would be fine?
The Christian ethic is direct: the permission for sex for both men and women is marriage. A lot of Christians don’t wait for marriage, and they don’t care. Like everything pertaining to Christ, it’s difficult. Grace is not only the favor of God, but the power of God which enables the followers of Jesus to obey his commands.
Beyonce of all people was much closer to the mark when she later sang, “If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it.”
I think the need to build majorities in representative and participatory government almost forces people to say “traditional values” instead of “Christian values” or “Christian ethics.” On the other hand, all three Abrahamic religions as traditionally practiced agree on this point.
It ought to be able to be left unsaid, but if you mess up, start over. Jesus the Bridegroom will never leave or forsake His Bride, the Church. We honor His faithfulness to us in this way. If you leave the reasons up to honor-shame culture or machismo, it can go sideways pretty fast, and usually to the distinct harm of women.
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