Safe Haven

Not A Cheerleader Don’t wanna fly Another flag. “Tell the truth, But tell it slant” Ain’t exactly right this time. Ain’t on no team, Ain’t got all the answers, But I’ll find Him If it kills me first. I have Christ, But what we’ve all done Is like invite Him to Supper ‘Long as He stays quiet. What about the questions, Like the smoke of an unfit offering? They will not be waved away Easily with a hand. He bids us in But we stay Outside, Where it’s safe. You mind this, friend, Mind it good, You who have lived near The River: I ain’t swimmin’ Unless it leads me Home.

5 Thoughts On This Tuesday 5. Are they too busy, or have Christian girls lost the ability to say, "No, thanks"? 4. I don't know if that mp3 site was just janky, or illegal, but in any case, 'A Love Story,' by Babyface is outstanding, and Arista should fire the guy who decided to shelve the album. Or is it "shelf"? 3. I eagerly await a Protestant answer to the hermeneutical/ecclesiological conundrum: 1) How do you prove a particular, well, anything from the Scripture? 2) If we disavow apostolic succession, how are we visibly, really connected to the Body of Christ? I await the Catholic answer to the same problem in 1), with an added bonus: It could appear that Catholic apologists appeal to Scripture when useful, and appeal to the revealed Tradition when the scriptural case is tenuous. I'm thinking St. Basil would freak out about that, I dunno. Let me state this in a humorous way: This is the "Everyone on 'The Journey Home' was in Fundie-...

Sometimes, the music charts make sense. The iconic, the lasting, the beautiful have their runs at the top, living on for a while on my favorite chart, the AC chart, and make a good number of us happy for years to come (while others fight an urge to find a high cliff). Other times, one cannot believe that such a great tune went unnoticed. Like this one . I'm not a singer, but I want to record this. It hit #81 on the Hot 100 some years ago, and hit #31 on the R&B charts. I am stunned.

I just wrote an e-mail to a friend, and the last line caused me to stop and cry for several minutes. What was the word, the thing freighted with so much meaning to cause me so much pain? "Family." We throw around the phrase "church family" in such a buzzwordy fashion that it doesn't mean what the words mean. God help me, I may love my church family more than my own blood. My pastors, my elders, and everyone else are somewhere between brothers and sisters, and fathers and mothers. I joined another church nearer where I live as an associate member, and I love them too, but it's nowhere close. No disrespect. Nearly every post here for about a year has been about the open and frank investigation of Roman Catholicism*, even if not stated. Provoked in me by an (apparent) inability of Sola Scriptura to provide definitive doctrinal guidance, to settle disputes, to silence heretics. And as a person who desires/desired to minister in the Reformed tradition, I was trou...

5 Random, Disconnected Thoughts for Today 5. I wonder if she likes fruit smoothies; she's not Econ Girl, but she's nice* enough. 4. Good job, Wainwright, and good job Brad Penny last night. 3. Nathan Hall should know that he owns the prize still, for the funniest thing ever written on my blog. It's been 7 years; congratulations. 2. Go Royals?!? 1. I cannot stand in judgment of revealed truth; if being a creedal Christian (read: explicitly, intentionally creedal) is better than non-creedal, the creeds cannot be assented to because they agree with my interpretation of Scripture, for two obvious reasons: 1. I, you, and most other normal people* [Sidebar: We shall call the abnormally qualified exegetes the Collins/Wenham/Feingold Exception] are not good enough to interpret Scripture by themselves, thus making most claims subjecting creeds to Scripture preposterous. And 2. they would have no real authority, hence my realization, "Derivative authority is a sham." I cong...

5 Post-Masters Thoughts 5. The group is kind of eclectic in the last few years--lots of foreigners at the top, and near the top. 4. I'm glad Tiger didn't win. Tiger has some living and growing to do; adding to his legend at a time like this would be really bad for him (and others). 3. Jim Nantz rules. He's approaching the Costas Zone, for those who need to be on my TV at key sporting moments. 2. Some people may not like how the Masters controls everything--including what you see the first two days--but it does add to the mystique of the thing. 1. I was not a fan of Phil Mickelson before this. I didn't even have a reason. But now, I am. And of Mrs. Mickelson too. And every day that Phil and other players are adultery-free...let's just say it should be part of the rankings. Unrelated Side-Rant: "Protestants do good things, but..." I hear sentences like this these days, as I spend a great deal of time with observant orthodox Catholics. It may well be that the...

5 Masters Thoughts 5. Tiger is right there--and he hasn't yet had a good round. 4. I hope the wind blows and the greens are fast tomorrow. 3. I'm rooting for the old guys. 2. I'm rooting for an American. 1. I want to see an old-timers match play with Nicklaus and Gary Player. Heck, Gary broke 80 last year at the age of 79 at the Tiger-proofed nightmare that is Augusta. Shorten the holes a bit, and give the old lions one last chance to shine.

5 Thoughts On Duke's 61-59 Championship Game Victory 5. Brian Zoubek, I officially recant all those bad things I said about your offensive competence (or lack thereof). 4. Get on the Singler Express now; he's the official senior leader now, with the graduation of Jon Scheyer. And yes, Duke-haters: the national media will tout him like he's Kareem or MJ; it's the annual ritual. 3. Coach K is genuinely surprised that this Duke team are the champs, I'd wager. And so am I. I'm something of a Duke fan, but they felt overrated to me. Overly reliant on jump-shots, they seemed not far from a terrible game and tourney loss. But a great job they did proving me wrong. 2. Look out for Butler and Coach Stevens. In one season, they have officially entered the "You Are Not A Mid-Major Anymore and Are Expected To Win" Zone, AKA the Gonzaga Zone. 1. Eat it, North Carolina Tar Heels. Bonus Point 1A. Yes, it is ridiculously significant that Mike Krzyzewski has now won 4 ...

5 Signs You Might Be Lonely 5. You converse with a deflated volleyball named "Wilson." 4. You listen to " Jamie " by Weezer three consecutive times. 3. Prior to that, you listen to " Perfect Situation ," noting how true the lyrics really are. 2. You listen to " Creep " by Radiohead, forgetting entirely that you hate Radiohead. 1. You shamelessly top it off with this . P.S. Side Rant: You know what's wrong with rock today? It's overpopulated with metrosexual whiners. Teenagers used to get mad at stuff. They used (not very long ago) to scare their parents with crunching guitars and in-your-face lyrics. Now, all parents are scared of is Johnny either killing himself, or sinking into a giant vat of nihilistic mental goop from which he never emerges. The antipathy toward electric guitars is emblematic of the whole thing. Wimpy. Ambivalent. Feminine. (Which, I would note, is fine...if you're a woman.) Anybody remember Rage Against the Machi...

5 Thoughts On Exegeting Exodus 19:1-6 5. This text begs for a later prophetic fulfillment. Israel's experience with both kings and priests was/is anything but unalloyed good. 4. I had better learn the difference between illocution, locution, and perlocution before I study with Darth Collins. Ahem. 3. I'll be happy when I don't have to do anything like that again, I'm sorry to say. 2. "It's not a habit/It's cool, I feel alive/If you don't have it, you're on the other side/I'm not an addict, baby/That's a lie." (Disturbing yet memorable song I apply to this book .) 1. Thanks for making me look good, Cliff and Deano.

5 Things You Notice, After Watching Ali-Frazier III Like, 35 Times 5. Though I highly doubt Don Dunphy was a racist, based on all the nice things I've heard, calling these two fighters "boys" during the fight doesn't age well. 4. This is the ultimate contrast in styles: Ali jabbing and potshotting at range, Frazier boring inside, working the body. 3. I've still yet to figure out who Flip Wilson is, and how he gets invited to these things. (Oh.) That's two guys involved in this thing who died in 1998. 64 is too young, too. 2. The man I'd like to punch is the guy who keeps yelling, "Ali!!!" at really inappropriate times. Telling the man who invented the rope-a-dope to get off the ropes is pretty dumb, too. 1. Frazier had 4 losses to flat-out legendary fighters--twice to Ali and Foreman each. Ali had 5 total losses, only 3 if you dismiss the ill-advised comeback in the 1980s. These were the best. Had Ali not beaten Joe twice, it would be easy to c...

5 Thoughts On This 5. It makes God sound like a Buddhist. (no offense.) 4. Who writes greeting cards. (Not that there's anything wrong with that.) 3. Admittedly impressive landscapes. 2. I hope you like earnest piano melodies. 1. Fat chance of God not mentioning his beloved Son when asked what we really ought to know.

5 Things Not To Do When Near "That One Girl" 5. Freak out. 4. Hum anything resembling a wedding march. 3. Mention sports (unless she loves it). 2. Lament the fact that she said 2 words. 1. Contact her. Play it cool, friend. P.S. Freak Out Session: BUT I CAN'T TAKE THIS! That was the worst thing I have ever seen. I am doomed. This is not funny. Then, she peaced out like she was Barack Obama at CPAC, dude. I am a creeper. Yes, I want to e-mail her again. Oh, fine, I was looking forward to seeing her all week. Yes, it was overhyped. But how often do you forget about all the other girls in your world? At this point, I think I could be surrounded by all the women from the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue and assured that they were all Christians, and I'd be like, "Yeah, but..." That can't be good. I want to jump in a freezing cold lake or something. Sheesh. I've gone mad. Plain flat-out nuts. I might even eat an onion. Alright, that's a bridge too fa...

5 Thoughts On The St. Louis Blues' 7-3 Loss In Colorado 5. That Stewart guy is good. 4. That Milan Hejduk is still really good. 3. Deflections are the bane of the goalie's existence. 2. Anderson was doing his best Roy impression last night. 1. In my view, a team with scoring ability is not just one who scores many goals, but can do so quickly. They say in soccer, "against the run of play." The Avalanche can do this; they will be very dangerous in the playoffs.

5 Things To Do When Dealing With A 2 Week Cold 5. Make yourself Tussin mojitos. 4. Re-enact humorous cold medicine commercials, like the one where the large man says, "You've got to feed a cold!" while holding up the 6 foot long hoagie. 3. Shorten your sentences, and avoid certain words that trigger coughing spells. 2. Nervously wonder if the instruction about taking a cough drop every two hours is more like a guideline. 1. Blame Obama.

5 Random, Disconnected Thoughts For Today 5. Methinks I have no game, dude. 4. Tim, are we eating pizza tomorrow?! 3. Jamie, give me a call Friday, man. 2. No, I will not mix my milk and cookies; that's just wrong. 1. I would pay money to hear Bob Costas announce a funeral. P.S. Side Rant: Does anyone realize that hip-hop and R&B are not the same thing? And that today's commercial hip-hop sucks? I mean, truly epically shameful? Are the A&R dudes at record labels even paying attention? Is anyone buying the crap on the Top 40 radio now? The '90s were awesome for R&B and Soul. Even the repetitive throw-away songs were good. And the phase maybe lasted into '02. There were rapper cameos back then, but we understood that it was a dance track or something. Not to mention that people actually rhymed words back then. Now, everything is Ghetto. If you sing a song now, you are either: 1) White, 2) Gay, or 3) Country. Even Robin Thicke can't do a whole album without...

5 Thoughts On A US Gold Medal In 4-Man Bobsled 5. Really? No offense fellas, but I need to see the tape. 4. Who kidnapped the Germans? 3. Who slashed the tires of the Austrians on the way to the event? 2. Was it under "First team down free of life-threatening injuries wins" rules? 1. I definitely want to see the team collective "Oh, snap! I think we actually won the bobsled" Face. Post-Script Rant: I saw something on a major non-left political blog saying, "Since Obama is uncofortable with American exceptionalism, would he have preferred the bronze?" First thought: I question the premise. President Obama is the living, breathing epitome of American exceptionalism. The whole campaign was one long commercial about how his achievement of becoming president (and his life before this) would not be possible elsewhere. Were all those mocking criticisms of his 'soaring' rhetoric hollow lies? Only a person who believes the reality of American exceptionalism...

5 Olympic Thoughts 5. Decorated though he may be, the American announcers did their best to hide the fact that Apolo Ohno is no longer the best short-track speed skater in the world. 4. Despite the death of Georgian luger Nodar Kumartashvili , the start for sliding events should have stayed where it was. 3. Couldn't buy the men's figure skating judges, eh, Russia? 2. Bob Costas should anchor all Olympic coverage until one of us is dead. Period. 1. Eat it , Canada.

5 Not So Random, Disconnected Thoughts For Today 5. I am right in the heart of zealous, orthodox Catholicism, not on the inside, nor on the outside. What I can tell you is that I cannot put into words both the depth of mind and of love I have experienced. They are living, breathing examples of the two greatest commandments. Someone should tell their story. I may not have the time, the stones, or the ability to do it, but I want to try. 4. Bring it, Derrida. I will go philosophical Bruce Willis on you, back up in your face with the Resurrection. 3. Dear Canada, I apologize sincerely for the fact that the United States is turning your entire Olympics into the sports eqivalent of a petition for US statehood. In short, you're getting owned. 2. Well, I might have the obligatory Olympics crush (es) but I think she/they might be married. 1. Hey Fadi, you and the boys can come learn Scripture with the "separated brethren" any time. We'd (or at least I) be happy to help. To be...

5 Reasons Why "No Country For Old Men" Is Possibly The Worst Movie I've Ever Seen 5. There is such a thing as too much suspense. 4. Brutal, callous murder. 3. No discernable reason why the problem is happening. 2. There is zero redemption. 1. Evil wins. I don't mind unhappy endings, but it wasn't even a cautionary tale. When you've made the brutal reality of the Bible seem Pollyannish, you've distorted the goodness of life as God envisioned it. On the plus side, Tommy Lee Jones makes everything better.